Crush

So devastatingly, things didn’t go to plan. I only produced one egg and unfortunately it didn’t fertilize – so we didn’t even get to put anything back – so basically our first round was a cancelled IVF. Ug it’s just such a numb feeling of disbelief, tears and frustration.

A week down the line I’ve begun to feel positive again – exercising again helps and I guess one needs to throw yourself into the things you can’t do on a IVF cycle… so I’m running again which I love and just keeping generally healthy – I went for my first session of acupuncture yesterday which I’m really excited about as there have been such incredible results with this Dr, plus started the Chinese herbs..  6 pills morning and evening – yukkie! Go little eggs go!!

I think now waiting a month and a half is the worst part. Failure makes, well definitely with us, more determined and one just wants to get cracking again . . .

So feeling in a much better space – we were knocked straight back down last night with a friends sms…. I mean what part of “We’re doing IVF” spells “please tell me the second you’re pregnant and how over the moon you are” AAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHH makes me so mad…. I know and understand that if you haven’t been through an infertility journey that people just don’t get it . . . but really ? Feeling very angry today . . . best hit the gym.

xx

3 comments on “Crush

  1. Ria says:

    So sorry about your news. Here’s hoping the time off will be useful for preparing your body for the next round. Thinking of you and sending hugs!

  2. anemptywomb says:

    Right back at ya xx

  3. gardengirl29 says:

    I am so sorry. (Hugs.) And I bet your friend told you that because she thinks, like so many people seem to think, that IVF is a sure thing. It was really insensitive, though, and I think that pregnant and parenting friends should probably spare us some of the details about how “over the moon” they are.

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